


i think he knows

by icepools



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Coming Out, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Underage Drinking, just a lil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:14:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25267432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icepools/pseuds/icepools
Summary: Lucas has created a list. Three things to follow every day. Or, in other words, Lucas’ plan for hiding the fact that he’s in love with his best friend.It goes a little something like this:1. BE! SUBTLE! (this should be obvious by now but you’re not great at this one)2. Don’t tell anyone in the party (except maybe Max)3. Do not, under any circumstances, tell Will.or: lucas isn't as subtle as he thinks he is.
Relationships: Will Byers/Lucas Sinclair
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	i think he knows

**Author's Note:**

> if a song is mentioned its taylor swift. no exceptions. all songs featured r listed at the end :) (no spoilers if u wanna look and listen while u read but yes they do mean things)

_14 june, 2018_

Lucas is a graduate now.

To be fair, he already _was_ one, but he’s not so sure his eighth grade graduation in their gymnasium really counts anymore. Now he’s a real-life high school graduate. He’s got a diploma and he threw his hat and everything.

And so did everyone else.

Lucas is a graduate and so are his friends.

Which is why they’re sitting in Will’s backyard around a campfire, talking loudly because Will lives in the middle of nowhere, so they can do that.

“Guys. _Guys,_ ” Max says after just a second of silence. Their eyes are bright with excitement and their expression is eager. “We’re _graduates._ We’ve finished high school,” When they don’t get a strong reaction from anyone in the group, they huff and cross their arms. “Come _on,_ it’s exciting! We’re all gonna be like, adulting and shit soon.”

“I don’t think that’s a positive thing,” El replies, quietly. She sips on her can of Coke slowly. “Adulting sounds scary,”

“You’re just saying that ‘cause you’re going to school alone.” Max retorts with no real heat to it. 

The two go on about how _going to a different state alone is terrifying, Max! I don’t know how the city works or how to handle being with a roommate I don’t know, or…._ and _it’s literally not that bad, El, you’re just a big scaredy cat._

The other four ignore them, instead exchanging amused looks and turning towards each other. 

“Dustin,” Micah starts, staring at her shoes and chuckling a bit, “I am so sorry you have to live with them for another four years,”

Dustin, in response, lets out a loud laugh that almost catches the attention of Max and El (but isn’t quite jarring enough). “If I’m lucky, they’ll get sick of me and transfer somewhere else.”

“No _way_ are you getting rid of me anytime soon, Henderson!” Max shouts and apparently Dustin’s laugh _was_ jarring enough because El and Max have turned back towards them, not-so patiently waiting for them to return to the group.

When they do, it’s silent. Until Lucas clears his throat and speaks. 

“So, um, it’s our last summer before we have big adult responsibilities. What’s the plan?”

“We were supposed to have a plan? Wait, do you guys have a plan? Fuck off, stop laughing at me, _what’s your plan?_ ” 

Micah whines against her metal can of pop as her friends cover their mouths to stifle their laughter. Their attempts are unsuccessful.

There’s a pause as everyone settles down. They’re thinking over Lucas’ question. He already has his answer, but he wants to wait and see what everyone else says. 

“I want…” Will starts. He’s staring up at the sky in thought. “I wanna go on a road trip. All over. Don’t know where. Maybe Canada. Canadians are cool, right? That’s what I’ve heard, anyways.”

“A road trip? That’s your big summer goal?” Micah questions, but it’s not teasing. She’s not laughing at him (like Dustin is behind his hand). Her face screams genuine curiosity. Will just nods in response to her questioning. “Okay, well, I wanna go to the beach. That’s not very exciting either, is it? Like a real beach. Not saltwater though, that stuff is gross. A lake beach.”

“How would we even get to a saltwater beach?” El pipes up from her spot across the fire. Micah considers her question for a moment, before smiling. 

“Why don’t we join Will on his little road trip?”

It earns a little laugh from the rest of the group so she seems to be satisfied. Plus, Will doesn’t seem genuinely hurt by it. 

They continue to go around, listing off their big goals for the summer (that they’ll never actually accomplish) and Lucas just listens. He knows _exactly_ what he wants to do this summer, has since the end of last summer. It’s the same every year. 

“What about you, Lucas?” says Max, regaining Lucas’ attention. He hadn’t realized he’d zoned out. Hopefully no one asks if he wants to join them on their summer adventures that he doesn’t know about. 

Lucas pretends to think about it, screwing up his face in thought. He relaxes a bit and answers, “I’ll go with Will. On his road trip. Travelling around the country slash continent seems pretty boring alone.”

(His real plan? Go wherever Will goes.)

It seems to be a sufficient answer, though Dustin giggles at it just a little. (What the hell is up with Dustin and this road trip plan?)

“That’s great news for you, Will. Since you can’t even drive.” 

Oh. Right. _That’s_ what the hell is up with Dustin and the road trip plan.

Will’s mouth falls open in (fake?) offense and he laughs, loudly. “Wow. _Wow._ Low blow, Dustin,”

“What would you’ve done if Lucas _didn’t_ come?” Micah giggles, eyes flirting between Will and Lucas quickly. 

Will opens his mouth to respond, then closes it, and opens it, then closes it and shakes his head. Their friends laugh. Then Max decides it’s a great fucking idea to throw their two cents in.

“Lucas is, like, the only one that _can_ go. The rest of us are, y’know…”

_Don’t say it, please don’t say it_ _—_

“...Gay and incapable of not speeding or driving in general?” Will finishes for them. It’s the correct answer. Of course it is. Everyone laughs.

So.

This is a thing.

Lucas is very much _not_ straight, but he has yet to tell his friends this. He doesn’t really know why he hasn’t. They’re all gay. Obviously they’ll accept him.

Maybe it’s a fear of being included. Is that a thing? Lucas has been the token straight friend ever since Dustin came out last year, the last of the group to do so.

Well. Almost last.

Lucas is so used to being the one that can drive, the one that doesn’t drink iced coffee, the one who listens to like, straight people music. (He doesn’t actually listen to that stuff, but it’s more the sentiment.) It’d be almost strange to be seen as _one of the gays._

Lucas does his best to focus on his friends rather than his extremely closeted self. Tonight is a fun night. Not a sad secret gay night. (He has that scheduled for tomorrow.) Max chases El around the Byers’ backyard, threatening to dump the rest of their Coke on her and Lucas laughs with his friends. All good here.

He stays quiet, though. His thoughts are still swimming and he needs to sit with them for a little.

He notices, in his silent viewing of his strange friends’ strange actions, that Will is also oddly quiet. Sure, he’s not usually the loudest one in the group, but he’s generally pretty quick to tell Dustin his taste in pop is bad or stand up and let Max run and carry him around the backyard. Not tonight though, no, tonight he’s just watching and drinking and smiling just a little. 

Lucas leans down slightly, so only Will can hear him. (Despite the fact that they’re sitting on their bench alone and everyone else is too preoccupied in their laughter to notice or hear.) “You okay?” he asks gently, smiling a little when Will looks up at him. 

Will just nods and smiles right back. Lucas can tell he wants to say something else, though, so he nudges his shoulder just a little. 

“Did you…” Will starts, looking down at his hands, “...mean it? Coming with me? On, um, my trip I mean.”

“Of course,” says Lucas, like it was the only logical option. And really, wasn’t it? “Wouldn’t want you to be alone,” _I’d go anywhere with you._ “Also, you literally can’t drive, so I don’t really know what you were going for there.”

Will laughs, grinning widely. He looks up at Lucas and his gaze flits down, just for a second. “Okay. Cool. We’ll go road tripping together.”

Will’s face is bright, not only with excitement but simply with the light the campfire is emitting. He’s golden. Lucas loves him. What?

And then it all makes sense. Will nudges his shoulder just a little before turning back to their friends and the spot burns and tingles for a second. And Lucas is in love. When did that happen?

Will isn’t looking at him anymore, bickering with Dustin and Micah over something, but despite this Lucas can very clearly picture leaning over and just kissing him right on his pretty little mouth.

Fuck.

“Hello? Come on, let’s go, I’m hungry.”

Lucas blinks. Everyone is standing up, drinks abandoned on the porch. They’re all looking at him.

“Sorry, what are we doing?” he asks a little awkwardly, standing up and moving to be next to Will. (Which also makes a little more sense now.)

“McDonald’s. I know it’s kinda far but I want ice cream.” Max says, arms crossed triumphantly. They’re looking at Lucas specifically. Waiting.

“Okay,” he sighs, pulling his car keys out of his pocket, “Get in the car.”

There’s a beep from the front of the house after Lucas unlocks the car. Dustin is quick to scream, “ _Shotgun!_ ” and sprint around the house to get in first. At this, Will and Lucas share an amused look. Will always gets shotgun (and aux) in Lucas’ car.

“Your efforts are futile, Henderson!” Will shouts back, running to the car and abandoning Lucas in his backyard. 

Everyone else is already around the house, so Lucas jogs a little to join them without being yelled at. (Max gets snappy when people are slow.)

“At least give me aux, Will! You know how much I hate your music,”

“Fuck you, Dustin. _Fuck you!_ I get aux and you have to deal with it. I don’t _care_ if you don’t like my shit, it’s my shit and my best friend’s car, and _he_ likes it so you can’t argue.”

When Lucas joins his friend on the driveway, Dustin is open-mouthed, ready to strike back. Not on Lucas’ watch, no way.

“Will gets aux. Always. And stop saying you hate his music, I know you like it just fine.”

Dustin huffs and clambers into the backseat of the car, Micah following close behind, then followed by El and Max. Will gives Lucas a bright grin and his heart skips a beat.

Once everyone is in the car, Lucas starts it up, but waits to start driving so Will can connect to the speakers. When he does, _Fearless_ by Taylor Swift fills the car. Will smiles, setting his phone down. And with that, Lucas starts driving.

* * *

Shockingly enough, the McDonald’s ice cream machine _is_ on. They get sundaes and some fries (El dips her fries in her milkshake which, what the fuck) and probably bug the poor employees. They’re not overly _loud,_ but there isn’t a second of silence once they sit down. Micah is also a messy eater. So there’s a lot of ice cream in her spot. (Sorry, Sarah the McDonald’s employee.)

Will is the last to finish, taking his sweet time to scoop every last drop of caramel onto his spoon. Everyone, including Lucas, is a little (a lot) annoyed when he finally sets his cup down, a triumphant declaration of _I’m finished!_

“Fucking finally. Can we go now? I’m tired,” Micah whines. All her weight is on Dustin, who’s rubbing her shoulder gently.

“Sorry, Mims. We can go.” Will is frowning, just a little. Micah is his best friend (besides Lucas _obviously_ ) and he doesn’t like it when she’s upset. Even a little.

They slide out of the booth slowly, and Lucas grimaces at the sticky mess they’ve left. They wiped everything up, so it’s not too bad, but it’ll probably be a bitch to clean up anyways.

(On the way out, Lucas finds Sarah the McDonald’s employee and gives her an apology and a five dollar bill. ‘Cause he feels bad.)

He pushes through the door of the restaurant to find his friends running around the parking lot. It’s late, it’s empty, they can do that. 

They all look happy. Grinning, laughing, occasionally trying to pick each other up even though the only people light enough for that are Will and El. 

Fuck, Lucas loves his friends a lot.

_Speaking_ of love and friends, Lucas’ gaze falls to Will. He’s bright, a little ball of a billion stars. At some point he ended up on Max’s shoulders. His head is thrown back in laughter and he’s holding onto their arms for dear life. Beautiful.

“Come on, you little rascals. Micah is literally half asleep right now.” he says finally, unlocking the car. It’s true. Micah’s eyes are half-shut and Lucas swears he can hear some light snoring from her.

Dustin happily climbs into the car, not even bothering with shotgun this time. El follows soon after, helping Micah into the car next to Dustin. Lucas doesn’t see Max or Will in the group, so he looks over at them, slightly confused.

“I don’t _know_ , Will, just...just start going down, see what—”

“I don’t wanna fall, Max! Just help me get down!”

They’re stage whispering, like they don’t want anyone (Lucas?) to hear. He rushes over to help, eyes flicking between Will and Max and the car. “What’s happening?”

“Will can’t get down,” Max starts, before letting out a sharp hiss. They huff, “Sorry. He doesn’t know how to get down.”

Lucas furrows his brows for a second, looking up at Will. His cheeks are red and his eyes are slightly wide. At the mere sight of him, Lucas just _beams._

“Okay, alright, c’mon, I’ll get you down,” Lucas puts his hands on Will’s waist (it’s so _soft,_ has it always been this soft?) and doesn’t notice Will’s sharp intake of breath. “Three, two, one, up!”

In one quick movement, Lucas picks Will up (he weighs like, four pounds) and sets him down on the ground. He stumbles a little.

“Thanks.” he mumbles, looking up at Lucas. Lucas looks down at him. They stay like that for a while. Or maybe it’s less than a second. Time is irrelevant when you’re in love. (And, wow, Lucas will never get used to _that._ )

“C’mon, losers, let’s go. El and I have a mega-super-cool awesome sleepover planned, and it’s getting late.” Max practically shouts, breaking up Will and Lucas’ _moment._ They’re already in the car, hanging out of the open window.

“Sorry, Max!” Will says quietly. Max probably didn’t hear him. They reach into the front seat and honk the horn until the boys rush into the car.

Once everyone is comfortable and Lucas starts moving, Micah lazily exclaims, “No loud music! Don’t care if they’re sad, just make ‘em quiet.” And then she starts snoring again, and everyone laughs.

Will opts for _You Are In Love_ by Taylor Swift. Lucas loves this one. Come to think of it…

“Did you choose from the one you made for me?” he asks Will softly, turning onto Dustin’s street. 

Will sighs a little dreamily and nods. “I did earlier, too. I know you don’t hate it but I’d rather my chauffeur fully enjoy the music in his car.”

“Okay. Cool. Thanks.”

Dustin gets out of the car, waving goodbye to his four awake friends and one sleeping one. Lucas smiles at him and drives off once he’s safely inside.

_Everything Has Changed_ starts playing, another from the playlist Will made for Lucas. It’s all Taylor Swift, but it’s just the ones Lucas likes. One day in junior year Will sat him down and made him listen to all her albums and make note of his favourites. He took that and put them all into a playlist called _lucas!!! :D_ and that was that. Lucas is pretty sure everyone else also has one, but if they do, he’s never heard it. It’s all the ones Lucas likes. Maybe they overlap. He’s not sure.

It takes all four of them to get Micah, now basically asleep, into her bed safely. Nancy, who’s in Hawkins for a few weeks this summer, is very annoyed with them when they come back downstairs. They give her a half-assed apology and leave before she can say anything else.

Normally Lucas would drop Max off before Micah, but he knew they’d need the extra help tonight. Plus, the second he stops in front of Max’s house, they get out and pull El right along with them.

It’s just Will and Lucas now. That’s okay. Lucas likes it that way much better anyways.

“So,” Will starts, reaching over to turn down the speaker’s volume a little. It’s currently playing _Style._ “What are we doing?”

Lucas drums his fingers on the steering wheel for a moment. “I told my mom I’d be out all night,” he answers after a while. Will nods slowly and bites his lip.

“So you’re coming over then?”

“If you’ll have me,”

Will laughs at that, shaking his head. He doesn’t look at Lucas. “Always,” he whispers, then looks up and says, a little louder, “Take me home, Sinclair.”

_Aren’t you already there?_

Lucas starts driving without another word.

_Fearless_ starts playing again; it seems they’ve worked through the whole playlist. Will runs a hand through his hair right as Taylor Swift sings something about running hands through hair and _absentmindedly makin’ me want you_ and _fuck,_ was that on purpose? It feels like it was on purpose. Poor timing? No, Will knows these songs like the back of his hand. It was on purpose?

He wouldn’t focus on it if it was anyone else, but here’s the thing. Lucas _loves_ Will’s hair. Fucking dreams of touching it until they both fall asleep or while they’re kissing. That line is Lucas’ _wow Taylor Swift how do you know exactly how I feel all the time_ line.

So does Will know about it?

Lucas switches between _it had to have been on purpose_ and _why would it be on purpose_ for the rest of the song, and the next, and the next, and he still hasn’t settled on an option by the time he pulls into Will’s driveway. 

He’ll figure it out later.

When they walk into the house, Joyce is sitting at the kitchen table, seemingly zoned out staring at the window next to the door. The sound of Lucas closing the door makes her jump, then soften when she sees who it is.

“Hey, guys. How was your little adventure?” she asks. She stands up to give Will a quick kiss on the forehead. He accepts it happily and hums a little. Will’s always been a touch driven person, and Joyce has always been one to give touch with pleasure. So that worked out.

“Good. We got McDonald’s. Micah fell asleep. Oh, and El’s at Max’s. Obviously,” Will replies, stepping back to lean against the table. His arm presses against Lucas’.

“And Dustin?” Joyce presses. Ever since the infamous Will-Byers-Is-Missing fiasco of 2012, she’s worried for everyone in the party. That’s probably why she was just waiting for Will and company to come home in complete silence, Lucas thinks. 

“Also home safe. C’mon, Mrs Byers. You know I’d never let one of my own walk home alone!” Lucas fakes offense, holding a hand over his heart. Will giggles and Joyce exhales with a smile.

“I know. You _are_ the most trustworthy of your little party.”

“Mom!”

Joyce laughs again, smooth and angelic, “Sorry, honey. You agree with me, though, don’t lie!” she rubs Will’s shoulder gently with her thumb, looking back up at Lucas. “You’re staying the night, right?” Lucas nods. “Your parents know?” Another nod. Joyce closes her eyes with a smile.

There’s silence for a moment, before Will grumbles out a, “Okay, cool, we get it, Lucas is the son you never had. I’m pretty great too!” 

This garners a laugh from both Lucas and Joyce. “Yes, Will, you’re perfect. I’m going to bed now, alright? Don’t stay up too late. Love you both.” And with that, she’s gone, bedroom door closing behind her. 

“How tired are you?” Will asks after he’s sure the door is _actually_ shut. 

Lucas scrunches up his nose in thought. “Tired. You?”

Will breathes out a sigh. (Relief?) “Also tired. Bed?” (Relief.)

“Lead the way, good sir.”

Will giggles again and _oh,_ Lucas got lucky. He’s not even dating him and somehow even _pining_ he’s lucky. He’s not even sure if that’s a thing, but it is now and it’s him.

Lucas has a drawer of his own clothes in Will’s dresser, because of course he does. It’s just some pyjamas and a couple extra shirts and underwear, but he has a _drawer._ Of his own stuff. Somewhere he doesn’t _live._ That sounds pretty couple-y to him.

He puts on one of his sleep-shirts (whatever the fuck that is, _really_ ) and opts to stay in his boxers.

Will seems to have gone to the bathroom, so Lucas just sits cross-legged on his bed and waits. He takes the time to look around Will’s room.

He’s seen it a million times in every stage. When Will was ten and had the walls bare except for a single _Star Wars_ poster, framed and hung up proudly above his bed. When Will was twelve and decided that he couldn’t have his room be so boring anymore, when he cried to Lucas and told him it was because he was scared he’d never see his bedroom again. When Will was fifteen and realized that, while twelve-year-old Will had good intentions, the mass amount of music and movie posters was a bit much. And now, with Will at eighteen, mature as he’ll get, framed A24 film posters and fairy lights and a bedroom he feels safe in.

Lucas thinks that this is his favourite yet. 

Will comes in a few minutes later, smiling gently. “Bathroom’s free.” he whispers. Should this feel as intimate as it does? They’re like, three feet apart.

Lucas swallows hard and nods, standing up and leaving Will alone in his room.

He brushes his teeth and washes his face almost mindlessly, thinking extremely hard about his revelation earlier tonight.

Love. Love? Is that really it? Lucas Sinclair loves Will Byers. It sounds right, feels right. But he’s not sure it feels _good._

Because Lucas can handle a crush. He can handle seeing Will every day and just thinking _oh, hey, you’re insanely attractive and funny in the least funny way and you’re cute and perfect I’d like to date you and kiss you lots._ That’s fine. 

But he _can’t_ handle seeing Will every day and experiencing an overwhelming pain in his chest. Seeing Will every day and crying every night afterwards because _why aren’t you mine?_

That is something Lucas Sinclair can’t handle.

When he goes back to Will’s room, all the lights are out except the nightlight by the bed and the one by the door. Will is laying in bed, phone screen lighting up his features. When he hears Lucas come in, he grins and sets his phone on the bedside table.

Lucas crawls under the covers and lays down to face Will. Their heads are on the very edge of their respective pillow. Their faces are exactly six inches apart. (Lucas measured once, when Will was asleep.)

“Hi,” Will whispers. His right hand rests under his cheek, red from the pressure. Lucas swallows.

“Hi.” he says back. Will smiles and glances down.

“How’re you feeling? About everything,”

Lucas pauses for a second. Then, “Okay, I guess. Little weird. I never like the first couple weeks of summer. You know that. Always feels so different from when we had school. No obligations, you know?”

“I do. I feel the same. I think this year’s gonna be different though, right? ‘Cause we have college stuff. And our little road trip.”

Lucas cracks a little smile at that, shaking his head. “Yeah. That too.”

Will shifts a smidge, curling into himself. His (cold) feet brush against Lucas’ knee. “I was serious, you know? I really want to. I feel like I haven’t seen anything outside of this stupid town,”

“You haven’t. But we’re moving to New York fucking City for four years, don’t forget about that,”

“Right. I almost did. That’s something. I guess.”

Lucas pauses, frowning at Will’s lack of enthusiasm. Maybe he’s just tired. Nevertheless, he throws in a quick, “It’s gonna be good, Will. Change. For both of us.”

Will just smiles, falling silent. His eyes are a little droopy. He’ll be asleep soon.

“D’you really wanna go to Canada?” Lucas asks after a moment, laughing a little. Will chuckles sleepily.

“Mhm. Max went to camp with a girl from Canada and they said she was the nicest person they’d ever met. So.”

“Ah,” Lucas nods, looking down, avoiding Will’s gaze. Because they’re _so_ close. So soft. He thinks he could lean forward and just _kiss him,_ soft and slow, tell him he loves him even though he figured it out two hours ago. If Lucas looked at Will he’s almost one hundred percent sure he’d actually do it. 

He doesn’t, but his brain decides that whispering, “You know...I’d go anywhere with you,” is a better idea.

Lucas tentatively looks back at Will to see his reaction, but all he’s met with is Will, fast asleep, blissfully unaware of Lucas’ little confession.

_27 october, 2018_

The next day, they forget to start talking about their road trip plans. In the excitement of summer, it simply slips their minds. 

They don’t talk about it the whole summer. It doesn’t happen.

They don’t fulfill El’s dream of going to Disneyland (though that was never happening anyway). They don’t drive into the city like Max wanted. Dustin had said he wanted to go to a music festival. That doesn’t happen either.

They don’t have the senior summer of their dreams, but they have the Hawkins Senior Year Summer they could get. They see movies and go to the arcade way more than they should. They go to the quarry and swim there, and while it’s probably not the beach Micah envisioned that night in Will’s backyard, it was what they could manage. They shove some air mattresses into Lucas and Dustin’s cars and camp out in them after swimming and screaming and laughing all day.

They don’t do much, but they manage.

Also. Minor detail. 

Lucas, somehow, somewhere, falls in love with Will even more.

There’s something about Will during the summertime. He’s much more laidback, the stresses of school completely gone. He’s more up to risk, for some reason, too. They find the part of the quarry with the safest drop and Will jumps off first.

Most notably, Will gets a thousand times more attractive in the summer. Freckles pop up on his face, his hair curls just a little from sweat (which should be gross but it’s not, somehow), and his normally pale skin gets just a little more golden.

He’s _perfect._

Lucas loves him, oh boy does he love him. If he wasn’t sure earlier he’s sure as hell now.

June and July are all love and happiness, cliche as it is. June and July are fun.

August not so much.

Because only a week into August, they start to prepare for leaving Hawkins.

Packing, finalizing travel plans, saying goodbye to the town they’ve lived in since forever.

It’s weird, the last day.

Lucas doesn’t have to say goodbye to Will. He doesn’t have to say goodbye to Micah. They’re all going to school in New York together.

But he does have to say goodbye to El, Max and Dustin. Not forever, no, they’ll see each other for winter break and spring break and summer break. 

But they won’t see each other in between, and that’s the weird part. 

However, nearly two full months into his freshman year of university, Lucas has decided that he can manage. He’s got classes every day, a new city to get used to, new living arrangements with a certain... _boy,_ plenty to distract him.

And, well, also, the love for Will Byers that just seems to keep on growing. And that seems to be getting more difficult to hide.

This is why Lucas has created a list. Three things to follow every day. Or, in other words, Lucas’ plan for hiding the fact that he’s in love with his best friend.

It goes a little something like this:

  1. BE! SUBTLE! (this should be obvious by now but you’re not great at this one)
  2. Don’t tell anyone in the party (except maybe Max)
  3. Do not, under any circumstances, tell Will.



So far, it’s pretty great. Lucas is a _fantastic_ rule follower. He’s definitely got this pining shit in the bag. 

Hopefully.

Today, they’re supposed to meet Micah at their favourite diner to catch up a bit. Will and Lucas live together and see each other every second they’re at their dorm, so they basically know everything about anything that’s going on with the other. Lucas could probably take Will’s art history quiz in his sleep. He wouldn’t do _well_ on the quiz, but he could do it. 

Micah, on the other hand, is a little more out of the loop. She lives in a different building with a complete stranger. Despite the fact that she’s an English major like Lucas, they only have one class together. She doesn’t share _any_ with Will.

These meetings at the diner were a weekly thing when they first started school. Once October rolled around, all of them started getting a little more work, which made scheduling the hangouts a little more difficult. This is their first one of the month.

Lucas is currently on his way back to their dorm after his only class for the day, and saying he’s excited for today is a massive understatement. Will and Max are his closest friends in the party (Max stole Dustin’s spot after they dated for a month which quickly caused Max to realize they were definitely a lesbian. Shit like that creates an everlasting bond) but Micah has always been up there. She was the first person Lucas met upon moving to Hawkins in fourth grade. She was his only friend for about a day until he met Will. Within that day, though, Micah and Lucas got up to some _shit._

So yeah. He misses Micah. Even if it’s only been a couple weeks.

He also misses Will even though it’s only been a few hours. So.

It’s not a very long walk from his class to the dorm, so he’s outside the door fairly quickly. He’s still not great at remembering exactly which dorm is his (he had the same issue with his locker back in high school), but the music that plays whenever Will is in is a pretty dead giveaway.

Today, it’s _The Other Side of The Door_ by Taylor Swift. Which _also_ happens to be on Lucas’ Taylor Swift playlist, so that’s a bit strange. Lucas doesn’t pay it much mind, though, and opens the door.

Will is in his usual spot, laying on his stomach on his bed and kicking his feet gently ( _god why the fuck is he so cute holy shit what_ ), papers and books in front of him. It’s never clear whether he’s drawing or studying, as all his stuff kind of looks the same.

Upon hearing Lucas enter, Will looks up and grins brightly. This allows Lucas to see Will’s book, which is filled with meaningless doodles and what looks like a caricature of Max yelling. Definitely not studying.

“Hi,” Lucas says with an equally warm smile, “You about ready?”

Will’s smile falters a little and his eyebrows furrow. “For what?”

_Lord. You’re lucky you’re cute, Byers._

“We’re meeting Micah at the diner in like, twenty minutes. I texted you about it. _More than once._ ”

Will’s smile has completely dissipated, and he slowly reaches for his phone. He squeezes his eyes shut when he unlocks it.

“You did. Sorry. Got, um…” he trails off, looking down at his sketchbook. Lucas knows exactly what he’s talking about.

Will has a habit of getting extremely focused on things and completely shutting out the world around him because of it. Sometimes Lucas has to physically get his attention by nudging him or something.

“I know, Will. It’s okay. Just get ready now and then we’ll go, yeah?” Lucas speaks gently, sensing the guilt in Will.

“Yeah. Okay. Yeah.” 

The song changes when Will stands up, and _King of My Heart_ starts playing. This one isn’t on the infamous playlist, which eliminates the thought Lucas had earlier about Will listening to it. No, this is a normal Taylor Swift listen for Will Byers. Which is fine. One hundred percent fine.

“Are we meeting her there?” Will asks as he changes from one of Jonathan’s old t-shirts to one of his own, slightly nicer and less faded. Lucas watches with fascination as he struggles to tuck the t-shirt into his jeans.

“I think so. Guess we’ll find out when we get there,” Lucas shrugs. Will nods and smiles triumphantly when he successfully stuffs the bottom of his shirt into his pants.

“Cold?” Will asks, nodding towards his denim jacket draped over his desk chair.

“Cold enough.”

Will takes the jacket.

He allows the song to end before disconnecting it from the speaker, shoving it into his pocket and then smiling up at Lucas. _I’m ready._

Lucas smiles right back. _Like clockwork._ “Let’s go, then. I don’t wanna keep her waiting.”

The diner isn’t that far from the university, just a couple blocks over. They make it inside five minutes before their scheduled meeting with Micah. She doesn’t seem to be sitting anywhere, so apparently Lucas was wrong about meeting her.

They’re seated in a booth close to the back of the diner; their favourite spot. When they sit down, pressed against each other despite the ample space on the booth, Will looks a little worried.

“Are we early?” he asks, glancing over at the door. Lucas can hear his foot tapping against the floor.

“Yeah, just a little. Why?”

Will sighs and fixes his gaze on the window next to their table. “She’s not here, so, you know…”

Lucas knows. Micah Wheeler is a lot of things; prone to getting lost is one of them. Will’s worry is understandable. New York is big and mean and Micah is small and vulnerable.

“She’s fine, Will.” Lucas says simply, placing a gentle hand on Will’s arm. He can feel his friend relax, if only a little.

“I know.”

They only have to wait for six minutes before Micah bursts through the diner, grinning widely. She gives them two seconds to prepare before she’s running towards the booth and jumping onto their side, hugging them both and squeezing tightly.

“Jesus, Micah,” Lucas forces out, but he’s laughing. She’s a little ball of energy, their Micah.

“Sorry I'm late,” she says, once she’s released them both and sat down on her side of the booth, “Got lost.”

Lucas squeezes Will’s arm gently.

“Well, you’re here now, so,” Will speaks slowly, but Lucas can hear the excitement in his voice. He and Micah feed off each other’s energy. When Micah is excited, Will gets excited. “What’s first on the agenda?”

They slip into conversation easily, like they haven’t not seen each other in a month. Lucas learns that Micah may or may not have the hots for a girl in her American Literature class. Upon hearing the news, both Lucas and Will practically scream in excitement and lean forward, absorbing Micah’s every word.

“What about you two? Any romance brewing?” she asks, once she’s described American Lit girl in extreme detail. Lucas leans back slightly, suddenly very uncomfortable.

Micah’s question makes Will laugh. Like, _laugh._ Out loud. “No way. I thought that New York would bring out all the cool city core gays, but the choices are about the same as Hawkins. _Bad._ ”

Micah giggles now, and Lucas screams internally. She turns to him expectantly. “Lucas? Any special ladies catch your eye?”

The question shouldn’t make him uncomfortable. He _is_ attracted to women. It’s a fair question. But he’s also attracted to _men,_ and the fact that Micah didn’t include that (not her fault, she doesn’t know) makes Lucas want to cry.

“Nope.” The word comes out strained, like it’s hard for him to say. It shouldn’t be; there _isn’t_ a special lady.

But there’s a very, _very_ special boy.

Will makes a confused noise next to him. “No? I thought you liked that girl from one of your classes. Sophie, was it?”

Lucas sighs. Why does he have to be in love with a fucking idiot? “Yeah, Sophie. I don’t like her, though.”

“Oh.”

Micah watches the exchange across the table, clearly amused. Lucas narrows his eyes at her, just a little. _What do you know?_

“Okay, so you two are still depressingly single then.”

“You’re not even with this girl yet!”

“Fuck off! I move slowly!”

“Ain’t that the truth…”

“What the hell, guys, this is so unfair! At least I’m _looking._ ” Micah huffs out, crossing her arms and pouting.

Lucas is looking, too. Has been since the tenth grade.

_Beat that, Micah._

Will and Micah continue talking, but Lucas tunes out most of it. He just can’t get Micah’s question out of his head.

_Any special ladies catch your eye?_

_Special ladies special ladies special ladies_

God, it’s stupid, isn’t it? Micah’s entirely innocent question shouldn’t be _bothering_ him like this. She doesn’t know. She doesn’t _know. No one knows._

And that’s when it hits him.

He’s hiding from everyone in his life.

According to Will, Lucas was the first person he came out to. Both times, trans and gay. He can’t really remember the trans one, as they were relatively young for how old they are now. But the gay part came at the ripe old age of fifteen, and Lucas remembers that day like it was yesterday.

Will had come over to his house, like always, and not two seconds into him visiting he blurted out the words _I’m gay_ and then broke down sobbing. Lucas had comforted him through it, held him while he cried, told him how proud he was of him.

But that’s not the point. The _point_ is Will’s demeanour after he told Lucas (and everyone else, but Lucas is definitely not ready for that yet). He seemed so much happier, so much freer. Like he was finally himself.

Back then, Lucas was still questioning, so he couldn’t be jealous of Will then, but god is he jealous of past Will _now._

Which is silly. That feeling is within his reach, all he needs to do is grab it.

But is he ready?

* * *

Lucas remains quiet for the rest of their get-together. He throws in a couple responses here and there, but for the most part he keeps his mouth shut, deep in thought.

Lucas and Will walk with Micah back to their university. Just like the diner, the two of them talk while Lucas half listens. 

He’s kind of sort of freaking out.

He’s decided on a major whim that he’s going to come out to Will when they get back to the dorm. But what the fuck does he say? He doesn’t know what he is. And how does he just—throw it into the conversation? _Fuck,_ how did Will do this to twelve different people _twice?_

Before Lucas is ready, they drop Micah off at her dorm. She hugs each of them individually, lingering on him for a moment.

“Are you doing okay?” she whispers, so Will doesn’t hear. _Fuck._

“Of course,” he mumbles back, not meaning any of it, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Micah just hums, squeezing him once more before letting him go.

“Same time next week, fellas?” 

“Let’s hope so,” Will frowns a little, “I missed that.”

“Me too.” Lucas adds in, first proper response in a while. He sees the way Will’s shoulders stiffen slightly.

“Well then, we’ll keep doing it. See you later, you two.” Micah says warmly, walking into her dorm backwards so she can keep her eyes on her friends. They wave to her until she closes the door.

Once again, it’s just Will and Lucas. Lucas and Will.

( _WillandLucas_ )

They walk to their own dorm quietly for a while, shoulders brushing gently. (Definitely not on purpose.)

“It’s always nice seeing her, isn’t it?” Will says softly, gaze fixed on his shoes. Lucas looks over at him, nodding slowly even though he can’t see it.

“Yeah,” he replies, absolutely transfixed by Will’s face and how utterly pure he looks right now, “I missed her.”

Will looks up at him, now, and Lucas tries to pretend he wasn’t just staring at him.

Will seems to buy it.

They’re literally ten steps from their dorm. Now seems like as good a time as any, right?

“Will,” Lucas says. Not a question, a statement. _Confidence._ “I’m, uh—I…”

_Okay. Confidence gone._

Will is blinking at Lucas expectantly now, so he can’t back out. Jesus. 

“I, uh—“ _why didn’t he plan out what he was going to say fuck fuckfuckfuckfuck_ “I like guys. Gay? But not gay. Fuck, I don’t fucking know.”

It takes Will a second to figure out what Lucas was trying to say (and he doesn’t blame him, honestly, what the fuck _did_ he say) but when he does he just _beams._

“For real?” he asks quietly, and why would Lucas joke about something like that?

“Yeah, for real.”

He barely gets the words out before Will pulls him into the tightest hug of his life. He squeezes back instantly, relishing in the feeling of Will’s arms wrapped around his neck and his own hands holding Will’s torso close.

“God, I’m so proud of you. Fucking superhero.”

Lucas squeezes him a little tighter.

He doesn’t cry, thank god. He doesn’t want to have to deal with that, not today. Maybe he’ll cry later, but for now he’s fine.

He feels Will laugh a little, hot against his neck. “Guess you’re not the token straight friend anymore, huh?”

Lucas, despite his longtime fear of not being the token straight, laughs wholeheartedly and melts when Will rubs at the nape of his neck with his thumb.

Yeah, Lucas is gonna be totally fine.

_14 december, 2019_

It’s starting to become a problem.

Lucas heard all about pining and shit like that. He’s read about it. All the stuff he’s seen has said it’s hard. But they didn’t say it would be _this_ hard.

In about six months, it’ll have been two years since Lucas realized he was in love with Will.

Two years is a long fucking time.

When it first started, he was fine. As fine as he could be, anyway. He was sad sometimes, but for the most part he handled it. The list he made when they started school again helped. He’s stuck by it.

But.

Somewhere along the way, the simple three-step-plan turned into the complicated and slightly confusing twenty-two-step plan, with oh-so important points such as _don’t stare at him for too long_ and _avoid all talk of attraction to anyone ever._

Maybe it’s overkill, but not in Lucas’ brain.

It’s their second year of college and Will and Lucas have moved into a proper apartment. (Paid for by their jobs and also Lucas’ parents. And Joyce that one time) This means that they’re together _all. The. Time._ They literally cannot escape each other. Which is technically a good thing, but combine that with Lucas’ internal struggle to keep his emotions in…not as much of a good thing.

So he definitely needs the list.

From the day he started said list (previously just in his head, but now it sits in a locked note on his phone titled _Lucas’ guide to ..?_ which seems ominous and mysterious but not enticing enough to look into) the number two most important rule was _don’t tell anyone._ (Number one was taken by _don’t tell Will._ )

_However._ Lucas isn’t really interested in following that one anymore. It’s stupid, honestly. Why can’t he tell anyone? 

To be fair, he did say in the list that he was allowed to tell Max (because Max knows everything about him), but he doesn’t have a Max right now, and something tells him this isn’t a conversation you can have over the phone. 

He settles on the next best thing.

In the early hours before Will stumbles grumpily and sleepily into the kitchen for Lucas’ infamous coffee, he sends Micah a quick text asking if he can visit later. 

Micah lives in an apartment building about ten minutes from their own. They’d wanted to live together in one apartment, but they had quickly realized that a three-bedroom place was _way_ too expensive, so she’d taken the piss and gotten a tiny studio, one close enough that she feels accessible still.

The reply to his request comes ten minutes later, just as Lucas hears Will moving around in his room. It’s a quick _yeah, okay_ followed by a _never text me this early again_ that he laughs at.

“What’s funny?” Will’s scratchy and slightly annoyed voice asks behind Lucas. He turns around and just smiles at his best friend. It earns him a scowl. “Coffee now please.” Will plunks down onto one of the stools at their counter, leaning his head on his hand. He’s cranky, but he said please, so it’s better than most days.

“Good morning to you too. Jerk.” Lucas teases, but he does get up to start making Will his coffee. He knows exactly how he likes it; two sugars and a tiny tiny splash of cream.

Once he’s handed Will his coffee, he decides to tell him about his meeting with Micah. And also tries to think of a reason that she would only want to see Lucas and not Will.

“Micah invited me over later,” he starts, already lying, “Just me. Said she can’t bear to look at your face today.”

Will narrows his eyes over his coffee mug.

“Okay, so she didn’t say _that,_ but she did say that the invite is Lucas-Sinclair-exclusive, capital E. Don’t know what she wants.”

Lucas is pulling every word of this out of his _ass,_ but normally high-alert Will is still kind of asleep mentally and doesn’t seem to notice.

“Okay. Have fun.” Will says shortly. Then, after taking a sip from his mug and sighing softly, adds, “You’ll be home by tonight though, right? It’s Saturday.” And he doesn’t need to explain what Saturday means for Will and Lucas.

Lucas’ heart swells at the usage of the word _home._ This is their home. Maybe not forever, but for the next two and a half years this is _theirs._

“Of course. I’d never miss movie night, you know that. Your pick. And you’ve got all day to think about it.”

Will smiles, the first one of the day (always the softest), and nods. “When’re you leaving?”

“Around four, probably. I’ll come back for dinner.”

Will just nods, his smile still present on his face as he drinks his coffee. Lucas stares at him, breaking both the _be subtle_ rule and the _no staring_ rule on his list, but he doesn’t really care.

If Will notices, he doesn’t say anything.

* * *

They lay around their apartment all morning, continuing their binge of _The Office._ At noon they turn off the TV in favour of listening to Taylor Swift’s entire discography in order while they do their homework for the weekend. Lucas leaves for Micah’s at 3:45, a little under halfway through _Red,_ leaving Will alone for the next two hours. 

When Lucas leaves the apartment, he shoves his headphones in and hits play on the song Will is currently listening to, doing his best to match the timestamp so it’s like they’re still listening together.

It’s right after he’s left their building that Lucas realizes he has no idea what he’s going to tell Micah. She doesn’t know he’s queer (after some late-night conversations with Will, he’d decided that _queer_ was the non-labelling-label for him), so he’ll have to tackle that as well as the whole Will thing. 

Can he fit that entire conversation into two hours? Theoretically, yes, most likely, but Micah is a talker and Lucas is a talker when he’s talking about his problems, A.K.A. a bad combination.

Lucas decides to make a list of talking points. He opens the notes app and starts a numbered bullet list. However, when he finishes typing, he realizes the list is entirely unnecessary, as it looks like this:

  1. Come out to Micah
  2. Tell her you’re in love with Will



And he doesn’t think that’s list-worthy.

He deletes the note right before he opens Micah’s building door. 

She buzzes him in after a moment, her cute little voice greeting him through the speaker. He grins at the console as he opens the second door. 

Micah’s apartment is on the fourth floor, and normally Lucas would take the stairs, but he’d like to have some silent, _calm_ time in the elevator before he drops two huge secrets in a row.

He spends the entire ride up psyching himself up under his breath. “ _No, come on, Sinclair, you’ve got this. You’ve done it once, and that went great! Well, you did the first thing once, but they sort of go hand in hand, so...you’re good. All good. Just a quick_ I’m queer and I’m in love with Will _and you’re out of there._ ”

Lucas steps out of the elevator, takes a very deep breath, and knocks on Micah’s door.

She answers instantly, as she was probably vibrating next to the door as she waited. Despite her reluctance to answer earlier today, she seems excited now.

“Hi, Lucas,” she says through a smile, one that Lucas returns.

“Hey.” 

“Oh! Sorry…” she opens the door wider and allows him to come inside. 

Lucas has always loved Micah’s apartment, from the moment she finished decorating it. The walls are decorated with different posters and drawings from Will, all different kinds of pink. While the furniture is mostly white and neutral, the accents are a billion shades of pink and Lucas can’t think of a more Micah apartment.

“So…” Micah’s voice comes from behind him as he looks over the room, “What’s goin’ on? Did you wanna, like, hang out? ‘Cause I would’ve liked to see Will if we were doing that. You’re good too, though. I like you.”

This is it. He turns around, facing her now.

“....you okay? If it’s something bad we can talk about it or something, but you know I’m not great at comforting people. I’ll figure—“

“I’m queer. Boys, uh, good. Yup.”

He pairs it with a stupid little thumbs up, trying to make it into a _whatever_ type of thing. Micah doesn’t react for a second, but then she grins so big her cheeks are probably hurting.

“You’re perfect. I’m so proud of—“

“Also I’m in love with Will.” he adds, speaking quickly while his confidence is still there. Micah’s smile falters a little, _shit_ she thinks he’s weird and it’s totally weird to be in love with your best friend, isn’t it?

She stays quiet for a minute, then giggles, just a little. Lucas looks at her like she’s crazy.

“Well, yeah, I know _that._ ”

_What._

_What the fuck._

“The fuck do you mean you _know?_ What?” Lucas knows he looks stupid, eyes blown wider than eyes should be able to and jaw practically on the other side of the world, but he doesn’t care at _all_ right now.

Micah laughs again, a full laugh this time. Does she think this is _funny?_ It’s not funny at all. What the fuck.

“I mean what I mean. I know. It’s painfully obvious. Like, _extremely—_ “

“Okay, yeah, I got it, Jesus Christ. Can we sit down?” Lucas requests, already on his way to the couch. He’s still in his jacket. It doesn’t matter.

Micah follows him quickly, grabbing a dusty pink pillow and hugging it to her chest. “Is that all you wanted to talk about? Just those two things?”

“Well, they _were,_ but now I kinda wanna talk about how _you already knew?_ ”

Micah just snorts, shrugging. “Yeah. Did you know that you’re not subtle at all? Last night, when we were watching that movie over here I swear you were trying to make out with him with your eyes.”

Lucas groans, leaning back into the couch and letting his head hang on the back of it. How can she already _know?_

How long has she already known?

“How long have you known?” he asks, looking over at her without lifting his head. She shuts one eye, thinking over the question.

“I think...summer 2016? It was that time we went to the fair, and you were following Will around like a freaking dog. It was cute, actually. But you literally did anything he wanted to. Which is still true, by the way, you’re a totally independent and strong man but the second Will Byers says he wants to go to the mall you’re on your knees like _okay Will yes Will that sounds nice wow Will Byers I love you so much._ So you were doing that and I figured it out. You know me, Detective Mimi.”

Lucas literally cannot do anything except blink and stare blankly at Micah.

“Oh! _Or,_ way back in like, 2013? After Will went missing. We were at his house and it was time for us to go but you were so adamant about staying. I think your exact words were _I need to keep him safe._ Which was bullshit, you were like thirteen. But you stayed anyway because Will was having a bad day. That’s the one.”

Lucas has to blink a couple times to resume normal human functionality. 

“How…did you know before I did?” he asks dumbly. That doesn’t make sense.

Micah tilts her head a little. “Um, ‘cause it was obvious? Why, when did _you_ know?”

_Well now I’m embarrassed to say!_

“Um,” Lucas looks around the apartment, looking everywhere other than at Micah. “The summer after senior year?”

Micah is quiet for a second. Then two, then three. She doesn’t say anything for an entire minute; Lucas counts.

Then she sighs, leans back into the couch, and says, in the most exasperated tone Lucas has ever heard from her, 

“ _Jesus fucking Christ._ ”

* * *

The next hour and a half consists of Lucas explaining his struggles with pining and crying a little. Micah just listens, throwing in a couple comments and some not-so-great advice like _why don’t you just...tell him?_

(Why would he do that? That’s so stupid.)

But it feels really, really good to talk about it to someone other than the virtual AI therapist he got a few months ago. While Micah’s never pined over someone for two years, she is a human being that has feelings, and that’s automatically better than the weird penguin that makes Lucas play stupid games he doesn’t even _like._

But everything must come to an end, and at six o’clock Lucas realizes he needs to leave now if he wants to have dinner with Will. 

“Shit, sorry, Mims. Will wanted me back for dinner, I’ve gotta head back.” he says, frowning. Of course he wants to see Will again, but his talk with Micah has been phenomenal.

“No worries. Don’t want you to miss your date!” Lucas opens his mouth to protest, but Micah holds up her hand. “Don’t wanna hear it. Text me when you’re home, okay?”

Lucas sighs. “Okay,” Then, when they’re at the front door, “Thank you, Micah. It felt really good to get all of that out.”

Micah grins at him, bright as always. Like a little star. “Always. I’m glad you felt comfortable enough to talk to me. I can literally only imagine what’s going on in your head right now,” she speaks softly, gently and oh-so lovingly as she pulls Lucas into a tight hug. “I love you. Stay safe.”

And then she lets go, and Lucas smiles at her. “Love you too. And I will.”

Micah watches him leave, only closing the door when he’s no longer in her sight line. Fuck, he loves her so much.

* * *

When Lucas opens the door to the apartment, he can hear _Dress_ playing. He sends Micah the promised _I’m home safe_ text as he takes his shoes and coat off.

“Hey!” Will calls from the kitchen, “Just in time. Dinner’s almost ready.”

“And what _is_ tonight’s gourmet meal?” Lucas asks once he’s in the kitchen.

Will hesitates, then laughs a little. “Kraft Dinner. I got the shell kind, though, so! Fancy.”

Lucas laughs, too. “Have you burned it yet?”

Will turns to him, now, leaning against the stove and _fuck,_ he’s gorgeous. 

“I have not. But I forget how long it’s been in the pot. So, um.”

Lucas looks at Will, at his slightly shy expression, then at the pot of water and noodles on the stove, then back at Will. “Is this your way of asking me to take over?”

Will doesn’t hesitate when he nods and shuffles away from the stove, lifting himself onto the counter.

“You’re insufferable.” Lucas says with a groan, not meaning a word.

Will smiles, keeping his gaze on his lap. He swings his legs gently. _Cute._ “I know what I wanna watch tonight,”

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah. _Dirty Dancing._ ”

Lucas hums, pouring the now cooked noodle into a strainer Will has ever-so graciously put in the sink. “That’s a good one. Did you want to watch it while we eat?”

“No, I wanna finish the music first. If that’s okay.”

_Of course it’s okay,_ Lucas wants to say. Almost says.

Instead, he takes Will’s hand in his own and just—holds it. Doesn’t squeeze it or rub it or anything, just holds it. Gently. Somehow, that’s easier than speaking. (Even though it goes directly against the _stay the fuck away from his hands and general face area_ rule.)

When he looks up at Will, an exciting and terrifying thought crosses through him;

What if he just kissed Will right now?

He could do it, he knows he could. Since Will’s sitting up on the counter they’re practically the same height. It’d be _so_ easy.

It’s almost like Will can see exactly what he’s thinking about, because his hand feels hotter now and he’s either breathing quicker or not at all.

Is this what the romance novels call sexual tension?

Lucas, silly stupid Lucas, decides that saying “Dinner’s ready,” is a much better idea than leaning forward and kissing Will.

Will, sweet little perfect Will, takes the quick change in stride, reaching to his left and retrieving two bowls and handing one to Lucas with a tentative smile. It’s a silent agreement to forget the last twenty-seven seconds.

They eat their dinner in silence, save for the music playing in the background. _reputation_ ends and _Lover_ begins.

Lucas sees the way Will’s face lights up when the album starts. He’s been listening to it non-stop since it came out back in the summer. He’s described it to Lucas as the comeback he’d always wanted.

So, because Will loves it, Lucas loves it.

Just as the second song on the album is coming to an end, Lucas looks up at Will and sees that he’s finished his meal, as has Lucas. Knowing what song comes next, he has an idea. A stupid, crazy idea that he should not act on.

He does anyway.

Lucas stands up, and holds his hand out towards Will, who looks at him, obviously confused.

“You hear that?” he asks, nodding towards the speaker. _Lover_ is playing. “Dance with me.”

Immediately, Will’s face is flushed and he shakes his head. “You know I can’t dance,”

Lucas whines a little, sticking his hand out even further. “Come on. Please? I’ll let you stand on my feet. You won’t even have to do anything.”

Will shifts, gaze switching from Lucas to the speaker and back again.

“Song’s gonna end soon, Will. Do you wanna dance or not?”

He hesitates for a second, clearly nervous. For no reason. As if Lucas would ever make fun of him for anything.

Finally, he raises his hand and grabs Lucas’, he stands up and follows Lucas into the living room.

Will allows himself to be maneuvered by Lucas, who puts his feet on top of his own then moves Will’s hands to his shoulders. He puts his hands on Will’s waist.

It’s still soft.

“I really can’t dance, Lucas, you know that…” Will’s voice is soft and tentative. He’s nervous.

Lucas doesn’t answer right away. He starts swaying them to the music, moving slowly around the living room. He only struggles a little thanks to all of Will’s weight on his feet.

“We’re dancing right now, Will. Kind of. And you’re doing great, aren’t you?”

Will tightens his grip on Lucas’ neck and nods.

They stay like that for a little while, Will on Lucas’ feet, Lucas moving them to the song. But then, as the second chorus begins, Lucas starts to subtly move Will off of him. He doesn’t even seem to notice until Lucas takes his hand and spins him gently.

Will seems surprised, but he gives Lucas the warmest smile he’s ever seen, so it’s worth it.

“You wanna try on your own now?” he offers, moving their hands back to their original position.

Will doesn’t answer, instead choosing to hold onto Lucas a little tighter, lean his head on his shoulder, and do his best to move with him on his own. He has to stand on his toes to properly reach, but they make it work. 

They always do.

Lucas is convinced that this is the best day of his life. They’ve never been this close before. Physically, maybe, when they were younger and would cuddle to fall asleep easier. But never _emotionally._ Does that even make any sense?

Combining their emotional intimacy with the lyrics of this song, these lyrics that are resonating with Lucas in a way that he’s never experienced before, combining this with their _physical_ intimacy, Will’s head on his shoulder, breathing so deeply, so calmly—it gives Lucas a surge of confidence.

The music swells. The song will end soon. _Now or never, Sinclair._

“Will?” Lucas’ voice comes out softer than he’d intended. Will lifts his head slowly, and Lucas relishes in the dreamy, blissed out expression on his face.

“Yes?”

They’re so close. An inch apart, maybe.

A million thoughts rush through Lucas’ head.

_I love you_

_I need you_

_Please kiss me_

_I need to kiss you_

“I have some work I need to do bye.”

He lets go of Will as he says it, not looking back as he walks to his room and closes the door behind him. The song has ended.

It takes him a minute to register what he’s done. When he does, he leans against his door and slides down it until he’s sat on the floor, and pinches his arm.

_Fuck._

Lucas just…up and _left._ Super abruptly. He didn’t even see how Will reacted when he said what he said. Holy shit, why the fuck did he say that?

He doesn’t move for a while. He can hear movement outside his door, and a few times he thinks Will is standing there, gathering the courage to knock on the door.

He never does. 

The music continues, though, so he knows Will hasn’t left or completely abandoned him. He’s still holding out hope.

Lucas has no plans of leaving his room tonight. (So much for movie night.)

_However—_ after a while of sitting and moping, he tunes into the music filling the apartment. _Afterglow_ is playing. Fitting, isn’t it? 

Are Will and Lucas in the afterglow stage yet? Can Lucas get up, open the door and give Will an apology? Can they move on and watch _Dirty Dancing_ and try, like they’ve tried for the last seven years, to pull off the jump and catch at the end of the film?

_Afterglow,_ much like _Lover,_ fills Lucas with a sort of confidence. He can go out there. He can talk to Will. They can find their afterglow. He stands up, puts his hand on the doorknob and—

Perhaps against his will, his hand drops to his side.

(He doesn’t leave his room the entire night. When he does, it’s at two in the morning and it’s to get a glass of water and maybe to check on Will.

Lucas finds him in the living room, passed out on the couch with a blanket thrown haphazardly across his legs. Next to him, on the coffee table, is a bright green sticky note that says,

_In case I fall asleep: I’m sorry_ )

_march 13, 2020_

They’re back in Hawkins for the week.

Lucas is beyond excited. He, Will and Micah weren’t able to go back home for winter break; they couldn’t afford it, and they didn’t want to bother their families for money. (A.K.A. Will didn’t want to bother his mom or god forbid his dad and Lucas and Micah simply tagged along.)

They had a big group Skype call with their friends back home, though, and watched Christmas movies through Netflix. It wasn’t ideal, but it was nice.

But _now,_ Lucas is running into Micah’s house (where the six of them have decided to collectively stay for tonight, much to Karen’s annoyance and Holly’s excitement) to finally reunite with his friends—physically.

He practically knocks Max over with the speed he runs to them at, but they don’t seem to care, hugging him back instantly.

“Jesus _fuck,_ I can never go that long without seeing you again. I don’t think I can ever look at Dustin’s face again.”

Lucas just laughs, holding them a little tighter. 

Will and Micah come in the house after him, carrying both their own bags and his. Will looks very annoyed to be holding two carry-on bags.

“Shit, sorry, guys,” Lucas says, wincing slightly. 

“Whatever,” Will’s voice is strained, which makes sense. He’s not a strong guy, and Lucas knows both of them packed a lot of shit. “Where are we sleeping?”

* * *

El shows up a little while later, and after settling into the basement, the group _finally_ gets their catching up time. (They tried to keep the catching up to a minimum during their Skype call, so they’d have lots to talk about during this break.)

Micah tells the group about her American Lit girl, who she’s finally asked out. They’re going to their usual diner when they get back to New York.

It seems that everyone in their group has their eyes on someone. Max, a girl who they say is on their school’s tennis team and who is _insanely_ attractive. Dustin says he’s extremely interested in his roommate, who also seems to be interested in him. (Dustin’s never been good at reading signals, though, so Lucas takes that little tidbit with a grain of salt.) El is talking to someone from her sociology class, and that’s all she says about it.

Everyone is pursuing _someone,_ except for Will and Lucas.

When Max looks at them and asks if they’ve been talking to people, they both shake their heads almost immediately, as if to say _no way, that’s crazy, why would I do that?_ The action causes Max to glance over at the rest of their friends, which confuses Lucas slightly, but he tries not to think about it.

The beers Dustin smuggled in help with that.

Lucas doesn’t drink often. Ever, really. Neither him nor Will care enough to try and get some.

_However._ When he does, he tends to get a little more confident than usual.

Which is why he’s going up to El and asking her to come upstairs with him, ‘cause he has something to tell her.

She follows him, of course, but it’s clear that she’s confused. When they get upstairs into the kitchen and Lucas closes the basement door, she voices her concern.

“Are you okay? Why is it just me that you brought up?”

Lucas blinks at her, setting his drink down on the counter. She narrows her eyes, then slowly does the same. “Relax, El. I’m talking to Dustin and Max later. You’re first on my list.”

This only makes El more confused, and she nods slowly, prompting him to continue. The action is gentle, but Lucas knows what she’s getting at; _hurry the fuck up._

“I’m queer.” he says. (And with full confidence! Look at him go!) He’s done this twice before, he’s practically a pro.

El’s face lights up immediately. “Oh my god! Twins!” she exclaims a little too loudly, so Lucas shushes her gently. “Sorry. Twins!” she repeats, but quieter this time.

Lucas can’t help but grin. Twins indeed.

“Can I hug you?” El asks. She seems to be assuming the position already, and while Lucas would _love_ a hug, he has something else he needs to say.

“Not yet? I, uh, I’m also in love with Will,” Lucas laughs awkwardly after he says it, previous confidence diminished slightly. _This_ he’s only done once.

El arms, once stretched out in front of her to pull Lucas into a hug, fall to her sides. She furrows her brows, bites the inside of her lip, then says, with a light sigh, “I already know.”

_What!_

Lucas whines, hiding his face in his hands. “How come everyone already _knows?_ Did Micah tell you?”

“Micah knows?”

“Yes! How do you know?” El opens her mouth to answer that question, but Lucas shakes his hands in front of her face. “No! No, don’t tell me, I can’t handle going through that again.”

El stares at him like he’s speaking in gibberish, but she doesn’t voice the questions she has about that statement.

“So...what are you gonna do about that? The whole, in love with Will thing.” 

Now Lucas looks at her like she’s said something crazy. (She has.) “Nothing? What?”

He can see the frustration growing on her face, and he reminds himself to step back a bit. “You’re not gonna tell him?”

“No way! Why would I do that?”

El buries her head in her hands, rubbing at her cheeks roughly. “You’re hopeless, aren’t you, Sinclair?” she groans, and she picks up her drink and leaves him extremely confused in the Wheeler family’s kitchen.

His encounter with Dustin is the same. He waits an hour before bringing up upstairs, where he comes out and confesses his feelings for Will in quick succession.

Like El, Dustin is proud and then confused. _Apparently_ he also knows that Lucas is in love with Will.

“What the fuck! Did El tell you?”

“Oh, is that why you brought her up here? That makes sense. No, she didn’t. I’ve known for a while. How old we were, eleven?”

“Jesus fucking Christ, don’t finish that story.”

Lucas tells Dustin outright that he’s not telling Will, which seems to surprise him. It shouldn’t—if he had any intention of telling Will, he absolutely would have done it already. 

“Why not?” Dustin asks, and this is a question Lucas does not have the answer to.

He leans against the counter, sighing heavily. _Why not?_ “He’d reject me. Obviously.”

Dustin hums next to him, clicking his tongue. “Okay, well, obviously I can’t tell you what to do about this. It’s your thing, not mine. Thank god for that, by the way, I wouldn’t be able to handle it this long like you have,” He pats Lucas’ shoulder, then continues, “ _But._ I would tell him. What’s the worst that could happen? He doesn’t feel the same?”

Lucas makes a noise of protest, but Dustin shuts it down quickly. “ _Yes._ Worst case scenario he doesn’t feel the same and you two go on with your lives. You’re best friends. Will and Lucas. A little crush—okay, more than a crush, but...some feelings aren’t going to ruin what you two have.”

Lucas can’t find it in him to respond right away. He chuckles, just a little, smiling at his feet. “So how long have you been preparing that speech?”

Dustin laughs quietly too, shaking his head. “Six years,”

“Twelve-year-old you came up with that?”

“...you could say that, I guess.”

When they go back downstairs, Lucas doesn’t miss the looks Dustin gives to El and Micah. 

(He does miss the one Dustin gives to Will, though.)

Lucas’ talk with Max is where everything goes south. 

It starts like the other two, with Lucas giving a quick _Max, can I talk to you upstairs?_ They follow willingly, after glancing over at Micah, El and Dustin.

Once they’re upstairs, Lucas decides to just bite the bullet. He’s a little tired of the coming out proudness followed immediately by the love confession confusion.

“Okay, number one, I’m queer. Yay! Number two, I’m in love with Will. Yes I know that you already know.”

Max fucking bursts out laughing.

They sober up quickly, shaking their head, but they’re still chuckling a little under their breath. “Sorry, Lucas, I’m sure that was very hard for you to say. Even though you’ve done it twice today already.”

Lucas’ eyes widen. “Did they say anything?”

“No, no, you know they wouldn’t. I just figured it out on my own. ‘Cause I’m observant.” 

Lucas looks at them, unimpressed.

After a moment’s silence, Lucas says, slowly, “Do you think I should tell him?”

Max prepares their answer in their head, but before they can get it out, Lucas is speaking again.

“‘Cause Dustin thinks I should tell him. And maybe he’s right? I don’t know. So many things could go wrong. Will could hate me. Could think I was a total freak for liking him. Fuck, what if it made him uncomfortable? Living with some weirdo who’s in love with him for two years without knowing it. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.

“But then…I guess there’s good stuff too, right? There’s that slight chance that _maybe,_ just maybe he likes me back. Shit, that’s the dream. But that’s just it—it’s a dream. Will and Lucas, greatest couple alive? That’s not real. Sure, we’re Will and Lucas, but not like—not like _that._

“Okay, so. _If_ I told him. Either he likes me back and we get together, or he doesn’t like me back and it’s awkward for a few days before we’re back to normal, _or_ he doesn’t like me back and also hates me forever. I can live with two out of three of those options, right?”

“ _Lucas!_ ” Max says loudly. From their tone, they’d be trying to get his attention for a while. How long was he talking?

“Sorry,” Lucas replies ( _finally_ ) with a wince. “What’s up?”

Max’s expression takes on one of pity. Almost sadness. “Lucas…you’re freaking yourself out over nothing,” they say, and then they say what Lucas considers his worst nightmare.

“ _Will already knows._ ” 

“No,” Lucas’ response is instant. His heart is racing. “That’s not true.”

Max frowns at him, a rare, truly kind side of them showing, “It is. But that’s a good thing, right? You just need to talk to him, and—”

“Did one of you tell him?”

Max’s eyes widen. “No! What the fuck? You know none of us would do that. He figured it out on his own. You’re not exactly subtle.”

The initial fear of Max’s confession has worn off, and now Lucas is just _embarrassed._

“So my list didn’t work?”

Max has to try very hard to contain their laughter. “You made a fucking _list?_ ”

Lucas groans and hides his face in his hands.

When they go downstairs, Max nods at Micah, El, and Dustin, confirming that they too know about Lucas’ secrets.

Lucas looks around and sees that Will is staring at him. When he notices, he looks away, suddenly very interested in what Dustin is saying.

_There’s no way,_ he tells himself, keeping a close eye on Will for the rest of the night, _Absolutely no way._

* * *

The rest of the week is quicker than anyone would’ve liked. They explore their hometown most of the days, as it’s all they really _can_ do other than drive into the city, but all six of them are kind of tired of cities.

Micah is staying an extra day to be with Nancy, who’s only in town today. Will and Lucas, on the other hand, are currently sitting next to each other in the plane, New York bound. Will has his headphones in, and he’s looking out the window like he’s thinking about something.

God, what Lucas would do to get inside that pretty little head of his.

It’d give him a break from his own.

Lucas hasn’t stopped thinking about what Max said since they said it.

_Will already knows._

Is it true? Lucas has been watching Will like a hawk all week, trying to find some sort of hint that he knows Lucas’ big secret.

He has not seen one yet.

His gaze moves downwards to Will’s phone, that he’s turned on for a moment to check the time and change the music he’s listening to. Lucas watches him click on a playlist titled _for you._

For who?

The song that starts playing is _You Belong With Me._ Lucas blinks when Will turns his phone off again.

_Who belongs with you?_

Suddenly an idea makes its way into Lucas’ brain. It’s pretty genius, if you ask him.

He waits a few minutes, to avoid suspicion, then taps Will’s shoulder gently. He turns to look at Lucas, a small smile already tugging at his lips. Without speaking, Lucas points to one of Will’s earbuds and then to his own ear. Will understands completely, taking out said earbud and handing it to Lucas.

When he puts it in, he hears the last few seconds of _You Belong With Me,_ and smiles at Will gently. Will returns it, but it falls shortly afterwards.

The next song on the playlist is _Enchanted._ This is Will’s favourite Taylor Swift song of all time. It’s in Lucas’ top three, but Will loves it more than anything. His obsession with it is kind of adorable.

Lucas looks over at Will again, but Will is actively avoiding meeting his gaze. The gears in Lucas’ head turn faster than ever.

When Max said that Will already knew…

Did they leave out an important detail?

Lucas searches his brain for memories from the past two years. That night in Will’s backyard, senior year. When he came out to Will a few months later. Three months ago, when he and Will danced in the apartment they share. The day Will came up to Lucas in the library in junior year and asked him to make a list of all the Taylor Swift songs he likes so he can make a special playlist just for Lucas. The apparent lack of Taylor Swift playlists for the rest of their friends.

Jesus fuck.

Lucas isn’t entirely confident in his idea, but he’s pretty sure Will has been trying to communicate with him through Taylor Swift for _years._

Forget being in love with an idiot, Lucas _is_ the idiot.

He can’t focus on anything for the rest of the plane ride.

* * *

When they get off the plane, Lucas is torn.

He has two options. One, he can pretend nothing happened today, that he didn’t maybe figure out something _insanely insane._ Two, he can try and see if he was right.

Option one is easier, but _god_ option two is (hopefully) much more rewarding.

Lucas trails behind Will on the way to retrieve their bags. Does he do it now? Wait until they’re home? Do it in the car? Not at all?

His brain decides for him.

“Will,” he says quietly. Not a question. A statement.

Will has stopped, and turned to look at him. Waiting.

_Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck—_

“I’m in love with you,” Lucas blurts out before he loses the nerve, “In the gay way.”

Will is silent for so long Lucas is pretty sure he broke him.

People walk around them, trying to get their own bags. It’s very clear they’ve stopped and are in the way. Are people staring?

“Um,” Will croaks out, breathing quickly and hands clearly shaking. Fuck, Lucas made him uncomfortable, this is it, this is where WillandLucas becomes Will, Lucas, no longer together—

“Me too. Also. Love you. In the gay way.”

Oh.

_Oh._

_OH._

“Oh. Well. Good.”

Despite the awkward and frankly embarrassing exchange, Lucas is smiling from ear to ear, grinning so hard his cheeks hurt, and he feels a little dizzy from looking at Will’s face, red and freaking _adorable._ He’s doing his best to keep his own smile subdued by pressing his lips together, but his efforts are futile.

“Okay. Cool. Good.”

They pause for a moment as Will steps closer, taking in this moment for all it is. Lucas can’t believe they’re in a fucking airport.

“That sucked,” Lucas says, laughing a little. He hesitates before putting both hands on Will’s shoulders.

Will giggles (fucking _giggles,_ what the fuck) and nods. “It did. But I don’t mind. Do you?”

“God, not at _all._ ”

Lucas could look at the smile Will gives him all day.

“Can I kiss you?” he asks, completely not part of the plan, but then again none of this was. Plus, when have Lucas’ plans ever worked?

Will hums softly, putting his hands on top of Lucas’. “...no?” When he sees the way Lucas’ face falls slightly, he panics, squeezing his hands tightly. “Not ‘cause I don’t wanna kiss you, _believe me_ it’s not that. I just…don’t want our first kiss to be in an airport? I mean, like, not a gross one like this one. And, um—I think that if I kiss you now I won’t be able to stop.”

Lucas’ heart skips at least six beats.

“Jesus fuck, can I still take it back? I don’t think I can’t handle hearing you talk like that for the foreseeable future.”

Will laughs again, hiding his face in the crook of Lucas’ neck. He can probably feel his heartbeat, _lord._

“Just take me home, Sinclair.”

Well, you don’t have to ask Lucas twice.

They move through the airport as fast as possible, holding hands the whole way through. Lucas feels like a fucking high schooler. And he _loves it._

When they get to the car, Lucas opens Will’s door for him, and he can tell by the red Will’s cheeks turn that _that move_ has a very positive effect on him.

Will is fiddling with the car’s Bluetooth settings when Lucas gets in, trying to connect his phone. When he does, he smiles, and hits play on whatever it is he’s got queued up.

_Daylight_ by Taylor Swift (because who else?) fills the car and Lucas starts to pull out of their parking spot. He feels himself smirk, just a little.

“Does the song choice perhaps have anything to do with what just happened?”

Will smiles and huffs out a tiny laugh. “It always does.”

So there’s _that_ suspicion confirmed. 

“Can I…ask you a question?” Will asks after a minute of driving silently. He’s tapping his fingers on his knee.

“Anything,”

“Um—how long have you, y’know…”

Lucas smiles despite himself. Just the fact that they’re having this conversation makes him feel fuzzy.

“Well, according to Micah she figured it out when we like, thirteen,” Will snorts at this, making Lucas’ heart soar, “But _I_ realized at the end of senior year. At the campfire we had. Just before we left for McDonald’s.”

He hears Will laugh again, small and concealed. “What?”

Will rubs his fingers together and looks over at Lucas. “You’ve got like, four hours on me. I realized when we were laying in my bed, like, two seconds before I fell asleep.”

Lucas can’t help but feel a little triumphant that he’s known for longer than Will, but when you put into perspective how long either of them went without saying anything, maybe it’s not such a positive thing.

With a quick look at the map, Lucas can see that they’ll be at their apartment in less than 12 minutes. Hopefully that’s enough time to tackle the next issue on the table.

“So, Will, um,” he starts, glancing over at his...something to make sure he’s got his attention. Sure enough, Will is looking at him expectantly. “What are we?”

“Oh. Um—I don’t know, boyfriends?”

“Seems like a strong word for two seconds ago,”

“Do you not wanna be that?”

“No! I do, I do, I just…are you sure that’s what _you_ want?”

“Lucas,” Will says gently, reaching over the console to put a hand on Lucas’ knee, “If I didn’t want it, do you think I would’ve suggested it?”

Lucas sighs and shakes his head.

“So I do want it. If you do.”

“I do.”

“So…boyfriends. You and I. Will and Lucas: boyfriends,” Will exclaims, then he sighs happily. “Shit, it sounds even better out loud.”

There’s something in Lucas’ brain that wants to say, _you’re so perfect. You’re adorable and you’re my everything and I love you so much._ And, while he can, he decides to bite it back for now.

He has all the time in the world.

They don’t talk for the rest of the drive, silently agreeing that maybe it’ll go by faster if they’re quiet.

It doesn’t work. Obviously. But Lucas has lots of time to mentally prepare himself for what happens when they get out of the car.

He pulls into the parking garage a little too frivolously, but he can’t even be bothered to care.

Will gets out of the car first, almost as if he’s forgotten what the promise was. Lucas blinks at his closed door before getting out himself.

Will is retrieving his bags from the trunk, and it’s now that Lucas realizes that by _take me home, Sinclair_ Will literally meant _we’re kissing when we get home._ Which is insanely annoying but also kind of adorable.

Lucas’ foot is tapping violently on the floor while they wait in the elevator. Why is their place so high up?

Will walks quickly to their apartment, so Lucas walks quickly, too. Within seconds, they’re inside their apartment and Will is dropping his bags on the floor.

“Here.” he says simply, waiting for Lucas to get rid of his things before bringing himself into his space.

Lucas goes to move his hands, but then he pauses. “Wait,” He nods at Will’s frustrated groan, “I know. But, do you, um, wanna put on a Taylor song? I don’t know, for the vibes?”

Will’s face softens immediately at the thought Lucas has put into this. He exhales, considering Lucas’ idea thoroughly. After a minute, he smiles and shakes his head as he moves his hands to hold the back of Lucas’ neck.

“I don’t need the Taylor Swift song moment. I’m _in_ the Taylor Swift song moment.”

Before Lucas can react to the cuteness that was that statement, Will is lifting himself up onto his toes and kissing Lucas. _Finally._

It’s everything Lucas ever dreamed of. It sounds cliche, but it’s true. It’s the culmination of years of pining, _yearning,_ dropping hints through love songs and always being a little closer than normal friends.

Lucas’ hands find themselves in Will’s hair which _yes,_ is as soft as it looks. Maybe softer.

They separate after less than a minute, frankly more interested in looking at each other than kissing each other right now.

Will looks—well, he looks like he’s just been kissed. Cheeks flushed, lips a little red and hair just slightly disheveled.

Lucas can absolutely get used to this view.

“Well?” he murmurs, moving Will’s head so their foreheads are touching, “Was that as good as the Taylor Swift songs say it is?” he asks, but he already knows the answer.

Will breathes in deeply, looking like he’s on cloud nine. “So much better.” 

Lucas leans down and kisses him again. Just because he can.

_23 july, 2020_

Lucas wakes up at eight o’clock in the morning. He is careful not to wake Will as he gets out of bed, keeping quiet as he gets ready for the day, as he prepares the morning’s coffee.

He sits at the counter completely calm, sipping his coffee gently and scrolling through his phone.

Lucas sits peacefully for two hours. He finishes his coffee and trades it for a glass of water when he does. 

Lucas has a calm morning.

Then he hears a very loud yell from the bedroom he shares with Will.

Seconds after, Will is sprinting into the kitchen, his slippers sliding along the wood floors.

“ _What. The fuck._ ” he says, heaving despite the short distance he ran. He’s looking at Lucas like he just killed someone.

Lucas blinks at him, then realizes what he’s freaking out about. He opens his mouth to respond, maybe give him a little _surprise?_ but Will beats him to it.

“Taylor Swift is releasing a new album and you didn’t _tell me?_ ” he yells, _loudly,_ clearly not truly annoyed but definitely a little peeved.

Lucas raises his hands in defense and this time Will gives him a second to respond.

“You’re a really cute sleeper! And you looked so peaceful, I didn't wanna wake you. And we were up late last night so I figured you were super tired.”

Will’s angry expression falters slightly. “Oh. That’s really sweet, actually,” He’s glancing down at his phone, and Lucas thinks he might be off the hook. Then, “Fuck you anyways! You should’ve woken me up!”

Lucas just frowns. Will’s not really hurt, is he? “I’m sorry. Did you want to go back in the room? We can re-do the morning.”

He adds the last bit in as an attempt at a joke. Will’s reaction will allow him to properly gage the situation.

It earns a laugh, which means that they’re all good. “Tempting, but no,” Will says, smiling. He puts his phone on the counter and steps closer to Lucas, previously soft smile turning sly. “How sorry _are_ you?”

Lucas grins, so brightly, and wraps his arms around Will’s waist, pulling him in close. “Super sorry,”

Will raises his eyebrows, hands moving to cup Lucas’ cheeks. “Super duper sorry?”

“Super duper extra sorry.” Lucas finishes, sitting up slightly to plant a sweet, firm kiss on Will’s lips. He sighs into it and melts under Lucas’ touch, leaning into him completely.

When they separate, Will rests his forehead on Lucas’. “You’re forgiven.”

“Thank goodness. I was worried there for a second.” Lucas says this only because he _knows_ it makes Will giggle. (He’s done it before. More than once.) He kisses Will’s scrunched up nose gently.

“Coffee?” Will asks when Lucas pulls away. And because Lucas really will do anything for Will, he stands up within seconds and goes to make Will a cup. 

“So,” Lucas starts, looking through their cupboards to pick a mug. He settles on the super ugly neon green one—Will’s favourite. “How are we celebrating this surprise album drop?”

Will gasps audibly, slamming his hand down on the table repeatedly. “We’re _celebrating?_ Oh my god, this is the best day of my life.”

Lucas chuckles a little, pouring coffee into the mug and fixing it up just how Will likes it. “Of course we’re celebrating! Why, did you think we were just gonna sit in here and listen to it?” He hands Will his coffee, watching with pure admiration and adoration as he takes a sip.

“Yeah,” Will says after a moment. Then he looks at Lucas, confused. “How _are_ we celebrating?”

“Oh, I’m _so_ glad you asked. Picture this: at midnight, we get in the car and drive around the city while we listen. We can even go through a tunnel, pull a _The_ _Perks of Being a Wallflower._ ”

Will watches him talk with a soft, dreamy expression on his face. When it’s clear that he’s done, he just says, “God, I love you so much. That sounds fucking _amazing._ ”

Lucas feigns surprise at his words. “You love me?” Will just rolls his eyes and sticks his arms out.

“Shut up, weirdo. C’mere and kiss me again.”

* * *

“Lucas?” Will calls from their (shared!) bedroom, tone confused.

“Yeah?”

“What do you wear when you’re going out to stream an album and be in an indie movie?”

Lucas laughs loudly, making his way into the bedroom. He’s got his car keys in his hand; he’s just waiting on Will. His stupid, perfect, extremely slow Will.

“I don’t know. A t-shirt? People in indie movies aren’t exactly dressed up.”

Will hums in response, considering it. “Okay.” he says, pulling on the first t-shirt he sees. It just so happens to be one of Lucas’ (one that Will _stole,_ the little fucker) but he doesn’t comment on it. 

“You ready?” Lucas asks, checking his phone for the time. “We’ve got three minutes.”

Will just nods up at Lucas. He smiles right back, and puts his free hand around Will’s torso as they walk out of their apartment in the dead hours of the night.

No one is in the lobby when they walk through it, which doesn’t surprise either of them. If anything, it makes it more exciting. Sneaking out late at night to go for a drive.

Lucas checks the time again and they quickly realize that they’re already late. They practically run to the car, laughing the whole way and only kissing once.

Will connects to the car immediately upon entry, thumbs flying across the screen as he tries to find the album.

“Spotify is literally broken, jesus…” he mumbles, more to himself than Lucas, but it’s cute nonetheless.

Finally, he gets the album working, waiting for Lucas to get out of the garage to hit play.

“Oh my god,” Will says, voice barely a whisper. The first song on the album is playing, and his eyes are wide. “Okay, if I cry you can’t make fun of me.”

Lucas looks at him, eyebrows raised. Will huffs and sticks his hand out for Lucas to hold. 

“Yeah, yeah, you’d never make fun of me, I know. Just drive and vibe.”

“Whatever you say, my love.” Lucas uses the pet name as a joke, but he definitely doesn’t miss the redness in Will’s cheeks after he says it. Oh, they’re gonna talk about that later.

They drive through New York City without talking much, allowing the music to fill the car instead. Lucas holds Will’s hand tightly, rubbing his thumb against the soft skin. During a particularly beautiful song, he brings their hands up to his mouth and kisses Will’s knuckles gently. The gesture makes Will’s face red, as actions like that often do with his boyfriend.

( _Boyfriend! His boyfriend! What the fuck!_ )

They drive for a little while longer until the song changes to one that makes Lucas’ heart leap. He looks at the car’s console, and reads the title. _invisible string._

“I like this one,” he whispers, hoping that the _it reminds me of us_ goes unspoken. Since they’re at a red light, he looks over at Will softly. Will looks at the title too, then smiles warmly.

“I like it too.” he exclaims quietly, squeezing Lucas’ hand gently, and that’s how he knows that his message has come across.

After some more driving (and a little crying to a certain song about a girl named Betty), Lucas finds them in a place they’ve never been before. He’s not sure where either of the turns lead, but he thinks that the left one looks good. The spontaneity of the action reminds him of _something,_ but he can’t quite place it. 

It takes him another song to figure it out, but when he does, he grins.

“Hey, Will?”

“Mm?”

“You know what this reminds me of? The drive, I mean,”

Will looks over at him lazily, shaking his head. Lucas’ grin gets a little wider.

“That road trip we were going to take senior year.”

Will’s eyes widen immediately, and he leans his head on the back of his seat. “Shit, I forgot about that…”

“Me too,” Lucas whispers. An idea springs into his head. As always, it’s crazy and risky and stupid, but that’s just Lucas’ brain. “What if we took it right now?”

Will blinks a few times before laughing out loud. “Are you kidding? We can’t do that. We don’t have anything with us.”

This is true. Damn. Buzzkill. But maybe… 

“So we’ll leave tomorrow. Get packed and then just— _go._ ”

Will’s previously skeptical expression has taken on an excitement; a fire. “Really? You’re serious?”

And Lucas is transported back to that night in Will’s backyard, at the excited expression Will gave him when he said he’d go on his road trip with him. It’s the same one he’s wearing now, except he’s just a little bit older and now he’s in love.

Lucas just smiles warmly at him. He briefly notes that _folklore_ has ended, a different Taylor Swift song playing in its place. He squeezes Will’s hand gently, and whispers, “Of course,” Then, after a moment’s deliberation, adds,

“ _I’d go anywhere with you._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> im entirely convinced taylor swift released folklore for this fic like i just know she did this for byclair
> 
> LIST OF SONGS IN ORDER (+ the title song which isnt actually in the fic but anyways)  
> i think he knows, fearless, you are in love, everything has changed, style, the other side of the door, king of my heart, dress, lover, afterglow, you belong with me, enchanted, daylight, invisible string


End file.
